28 years

I've been on this earth for 28 years.
                         Weird.
For some reason this birthday made me reflect more than my others.  I'm not entirely sure why.  Maybe it's because I'm closer to 30 than I've ever been before (I'm choking back tears as I type that) and because that makes you think....what have I done with my life and what do I want to accomplish with the rest of my life.  As I reflected I decided to make a list of 28 of the most important lessons I've learned.
1. Your job does not define you
2. Your marital status does not define you

3. Some people are just jerks
4. But some people are just misunderstood
5. Enjoy your time with your parents/family

6. Call your grandparents
7. Listen to them

8. You are the only one who decides how you feel about your body
9. Laughing so hard you can't breathe is still one of the best feelings

10. Your friends will occasionally be the worst...but so will you
11. Forgive always....forgive others, forgive yourself
12. People are not usually secretly in love with you
13. Don't watch "Footloose" just because everyone thinks it's weird you haven't
14. Always take your make up off before bed
15. A strong red lip can make you feel invincible

16. Dance as much as possible
17. Tell people what they mean to you.  Even if it's uncomfortable...you will never regret it.
18. Don't spend your time and energy on people who don't return the gesture
19. If he doesn't text you back....life goes on
20. When you experience loss...it will feel like you are suffocating.  You will not be able to breathe and you will feel like the world is literally caving in.  It is not.  And one day you will wake up and you will be breathing a bit easier.  You will be stronger even if you can't fathom that in the moment.  You will be ok.
21. If it makes you happy and it's not hurting others...do it.
22. Your siblings will always be your best friends

23. Drink water.
24. Don't be afraid to fail
 
25. Wear comfortable shoes
26. The ocean is the most healing place on the earth

27. Go outside and experience the beauty of the earth as much as possible
28. Above everything else....love yourself fiercely.

So here's to 28 years and more to come!  I plan to continue to fill each day with joy and as much adventure as possible.  Life is short.
And sometimes birthdays are hard.

Weekend Collage

weekend collage by vanessanelson featuring lips makeup

A weekend collage update!!! 

Things I loved this weekend.....

for me it was all about cats and polka dots for some reason and I went for it.  I'm also obsessing over this Michael Kors handbag (are you dying right now???)  Flowerbomb perfume is my signature scent and so when I'm needing a boost of confidence or I know my outfit is on point and I want to add to my (ahem) allure it's definitely my go to.  I talked about Too Faced "Better Than Sex" mascara in my September Favorites video (which I'm sure you all watched) and it's definitely become a make up staple of mine.  And FINALLY Autumn is upon us which means I'm breaking out the dark nail polish like this Nars one and the burgundy lipsticks like my all time favorite Rouge Volupte #12 by YSL.
I've also decided that my wedding song will probably be "Tenerife Sea" by Ed Sheeran.  Have a listen.  It's lovely.

October is the best month of the year and I'm looking forward to this one!
How was your weekend?  Any new discoveries?  Did you see a rainbow, bask in the beautiful mountains, contemplate life by the sea, fall in love, make a wish....
share your amazing weekend adventures in the comments!
xoxo
V

A Letter to my Someday

Here's the thing: 
I think I could love you 
really hard. I truly do. 

I used to pinch my skin, 
rub it raw, 
hoping that my exterior would fade.

You see, I know I'm not much. 

My fingers are too bony, my thighs rub together when I walk, and my lip always quivers 
even when it’s the middle of summer. 

I talk too loud in movie theaters and too quiet in front of microphones. 

I have a thick skin, and terrible feet 
and my hands tremble when I cry.
I wander, 
I never seem to stay in one place
 but most of the time I never quite know
 where I'm heading.

I know I'm not much to look at 
but I've been told that I've got a heart 
almost as deep as the Pacific Ocean and 
I'll love you with every inch of it,
 if you’ll let me.

Here's the thing:
 when I love, I love hard 
because I have never believed in 
doing things half-heartedly.

I'm going to love you with every corner of me. 

So here, 
this is my heart.

I know it’s not much but
 it’s all I've got.

Back With A Bang!

Why hello there everyone!!!

Yes blogging has kind of taken a backseat to "real life" but I'm back and kicking it off with.......

A NEW VIDEO!!!

I know right???

Go ahead and just click HERE to take a peek! I talk about all my favorite things for the month of September so obviously....it's very important. You can even subscribe and give it a thumbs up if you want.

Hope you're ready to hear from me again!

xoxo
V

To live would be an awfully big adventure....

"You know that place between sleep and awake?  That place where you still remember dreaming?  That's where I'll always love you Peter Pan.  That's where I'll be waiting"

-Hook 

I've never been to Neverland but Robin Williams took me there.  I've never been trapped in a board game but Robin Williams made me feel like I had.  I've never been a genius or a prodigy but Robin Williams taught me there is more to life.  I've never found a magic lamp but I wanted a friend like Genie.  I've never been to Vietnam but I've said Good Morning to it.  I've never written poetry but I have felt the emotions in "O Captain My Captain".  I've never had a nanny but I've learned the importance of doing anything for your family.  I could go on and on.  I know he didn't write the words he spoke but he delivered both comedic and dramatic roles completely relatable.  You know someone was special when the world mourns as if they lost a member of their family.

Robin Williams....you will be greatly missed.

• Maroon 5 : It Was Always You
• Stu Larsen: San Francisco
• Matt Wertz : Old Flame
• Jason Mraz : Hello You Beautiful Thing
• Angus & Julia Stone : A Heartbreak
• Troye Sivan : Happy Little Pill
• Blink 182 : Pretty Little Girl
• Iggy Azalea (feat Rita Ora) : Black Widow
• KONGOS: Come With Me Now
• Hilary Duff : Chasing The Sun
• Sam Smith : I'm Not The Only One 
• Birdy : Wings
• Rixton : Wait On Me
• Laura Welsh : Break The Fall

Isn't That Something?

The first person who saw your face was delighted by you. Isn’t that something? You managed to bring joy only by breathing. 
Your mother will occasionally peek through the cracks of your door when you are sleeping, even now, to make sure that she can see the movements of your chest. 
The boy who kissed you in the park last night isn’t in love with you, he won’t even stay, but he meant every second of those minutes. 
You’ll walk a city street that your feet have never touched before and you’ll be terrified of getting lost and that feeling is what’ll help you find the way home. 
You’ll give your money to a homeless man and he will hold your hand firmly between his and he will say ‘thank you so, so much’ and isn’t that something?
There’s a piece of music that makes your heart feel like it’s bleeding. Listen to it. Listen to it again. 
When was the last time you paused to stare at night time? 
Did you know that there is at least one person in your life who will jump in front of a hail of bullets for you, without your asking. 
Your entire body is made of nerves. Feel things. 
Take walks in places you’ve never been. 
Take photographs of people not everyone considers beautiful. Find loveliness in them. 
Let go of the things that are killing you from the inside out. 
One day you’re going to be part of the sky, you’re going to be that beautiful and that necessary but not today. Not today.

New Home Shopping

I both love and hate moving.  Hate for the obvious reasons....packing, cleaning, hauling things (basically labor in general)
BUT I LOVE shopping for a new home.  Deciding the new set up of your bedroom.....new ideas to decorate....pinning things to your Pinterest board....
Anthropologie, Crate & Barrel, Ikea, Pottery Barn....all these catalogs are like pornography for me. My heart literally starts racing faster as I thumb through the pages and ideas start jumping at me.
My hands are sweating just typing this.

I thought I would share some ideas and things that I'm currently loving.

Bathroom  

                                    L to R:  Owl Container - ModCloth {here}

                                                 Owl Bath Mat - ModCloth {here}

                                                 Shower Caddy - ModCloth {here}

                                                 Owl Toothbrush Tree - ModCloth {here}

                                                 Falling Petals Shower Curtain - Macy's {here}

                                                Acrylic Lipstick Organizer - The Container Store {here}

Some of these I have actually already bought....and yes I clearly have an obsession with owls.  I just love quirky little things to make your bathroom fun and organized. 

Pillows

         L to R:    Loving Room Pillow - ModCloth {here}

                                                      Hello Pillow - ModCloth {here}

                                                      Sloth Pillow - ModCloth {here}

                                                      Inspired Pillow - ModCloth {here}

                                                      Wandering Star Pillow - Anthropologie {here}

                                                      Feline Pillow - ModCloth {here}

I'm a sucker for a decorative pillow.  Pretty ones, funny ones....you name it.  Love.

Bedroom

 L to R:     Memorable Style Frame - ModCloth {here}

                                                Beach Radio - Anthropologie {here}

                                                Touching Memories Frame - ModCloth {here}

                                                Pomdelion Bouquet - Anthropologie {here}

I love little accents in the bedroom.  Fun kitschy things.  I like the idea of a vintage radio on a vanity next to fun little pom pom flowers.  Unique.  Things people notice that make your bedroom different. 

Lighting/Candles

                                     L to R:   Sweet Almond and Macaroon Candle - Jo Malone {here}

                                                  Peony and Blush Suede Candle - Jo Malone {here}

                                                  Just Picked Candle Tins - Anthropologie {here}

                                                  Peach Cilantro Twist Candle - Bath and Body Works {here}

                                                  Capri Blue Swirled Jar Candle - Anthropologie {here}

                                                  Rosette Glow String Lights - Target {here}

                                                  PS Maskros Light - Ikea {here}

                                                  Kristaller Light - Ikea {here}

I love candles.  They are so relaxing.  I have about a billion candles at any one time and I'll just turn off the lights and watch a movie with the candles and it's seriously like heaven.  Also.....chandeliers.....I mean...is there anything more cozy or romantic?

I'm also pinning ideas like crazy on Pinterest.  If you're a Pinterest lover....you can follow me and share all your amazing decorating ideas with me....I need them!

xxx

V

guess who's back....

100 points to the person who knows what song inspired the title of this post.

I thought to get back into it I would do a little life update courtesy of Instagram.

Summer is such a fun time.  Celebrations, laughter, fun.
July however always seems to be a sad month for me every year.  This year was especially sad.  Our little puppy Pippin was hit by a car and didn't make it.  This was a devastating blow for our family and one that we will not be over any time soon.  Strange the way animals get into our hearts isn't it?  Losing a pet becomes just as tragic as losing a human family member.  Many tears have been shed and I'm ready for a new start come August.
New job, new home...new.  I like starting new.

What new things are you looking forward to?  Leave a comment!
xxx
V

P.S. feel free to follow me on instagram! @vanessanelson
I'm happy to have you :)

Falling In Love

I am a girl who always wants things too much.  I get attached.  I fall in love with a hundred things a day.
I was recently described as an "all or nothing kind of girl" which is entirely accurate.  I'm either completely uninterested or completely obsessed.  The "problem" with this is that it sets me up to be heartbroken a hundred times a day.  Does that make sense?  I fall in love with possibilities, I fall in love with ideas, I fall in love with things I want, I fall in love with people.  Then when these things don't happen or don't work out....I crash and become so disappointed.  Does anyone else have this problem?  The thing is I don't think I'll ever stop being that way.  It's who I am.  I found a quote that says

"Get excited about the little things.  About wearing a new outfit for the first time.  About Saturday lunches with your best friends.  About the new cute guy you work with.  About finding an extra dollar in your pocket.  About anything that even remotely makes you happy because as you grow up, passions fade and enthusiasm gets mistaken for foolishness.  Don't let the grays of the world keep you from shining."

So I've just decided to keep living this way.  Even though the downs hurt a little more...it's worth it to live a passionate life.  

A little more context to this post.....I recently grew attached to 3 very big ideas.  

1. A townhouse I've been wanting to live in for 2 years

2. A huge promotion at work

3. A boy

I tediously filled out all the paperwork for the townhouse and we waited and waited and in the end....we did not get it.  I was crushed.  I found another townhouse that we loved and we were told we had gotten it and were getting ready to sign the papers and put down the deposit....20 minutes before we were supposed to leave...the lady called and told us she changed her mind.  I was both crushed AND furious.  So.....it's left me a little lackluster.

The bright spot is that I got the promotion at work I've been wanting!!!!!  It's a huge deal and very exciting and I start Monday! This promotion is definitely a mixed bag as I am so excited to start a new adventure but it means I will be leaving Clinique.  Clinique has been the most amazing company to work for and my co-workers at that counter are my family.  At least I will still work in the same building as them and see them but I do get sad if I think about it too much.

And the boy....well....that's to be continued.

xoxo

V

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry.
I'm sorry that I couldn't follow the 'rules' of being a lady.  I'm sorry that I fell in love with you before you could fall in love with me.  I'm sorry that I didn't know how to play hard to get.  I'm sorry that I wasn't mysterious enough.
I'm sorry that I was nice.  I'm sorry that I was 'kind' that I was unable to playfully hit you.  I'm sorry that I was too honest, that I didn't know how to keep secrets from you.  I'm sorry that I was considerate.  I'm sorry that I cared about your needs more than I did with mine.  I'm sorry for the time when I adjusted my schedule just so I could come out and support you when you asked me to.  I'm sorry that I didn't set many boundaries because I trusted you.  I'm sorry that I loved you as if I'd never been hurt.
I'm sorry that I was so sensitive.  I'm sorry that I had to take a minute or two to digest your sarcasm.  I'm sorry that I cared about you more than I should.  I'm sorry that I cared to the point where I over-analyzed the details just so I knew how to not hurt you.  I'm sorry that I wasn't strong enough to handle my emotions.  I'm sorry that I was willing to take extra steps to love you like I wished you could love me.  I'm sorry I was willing to face my fears for you.
I'm sorry.  I'm sorry that I can't change.  I'm sorry.

.....things I've wanted to say to someone but never did.

Letter To My 12 Year Old Self

Dear 12 year old self,
Hey girl.
Before you ask me when you'll look like Britney Spears and get that boy to ask you out....I've got to tell you something important.  Yes....shockingly enough there are more important things than boys asking you out.  I promise.
First: don't worry about looking like Britney Spears ok?  In 2007 she'll be worse off than you have ever been in your life.  The grass always looks greener on the other side (plus she's not even WITH Justin Timberlake anymore...and no you aren't either...but that's some bad news for another day).  You don't have to look like what you think is beautiful to be beautiful.  Don't worry about being blonde and thin and the most gorgeous girl in every room.  That won't happen but I promise you that in the end when you finally learn to love and accept yourself you will always be the most confident girl in the room and that's more important than temporary and shallow beauty anyway....it really is.  Love yourself for what makes you different.  All that time you spend doing things that seem weird to others will someday be what helps you have intelligent conversations with people.  You can be funny but also be smart because you have to be smart to get the joke.
Be kind.  Be loving.  These things don't make you a nerd.  They make you empathetic.  They make you a good friend.
Second: Show gratitude always.  Especially to Mom and Dad.  Yeah they're like sooooo annoying but it's only because they love you and sometimes you're a pain in the you know what (you're 12 so I'm still gonna keep this PG).  No matter how mean you are they will not stop loving you.  They will support you later when you need it.  Someday you'll live far away from them and you'll miss them so much you cry every night.  They will need you to love and support them through some really hard times so show them how grateful you are for everything they've done for you by trying to repay them.
Third: Forgive.  Forgive everyone.  People will hurt you in some very bad ways....you'll get through it.  If you don't forgive them you will become bitter and you'll only end up hurting yourself. So forgive generously.
Last: Don't let people push you around.  Figuring out how to be kind, loving, and forgiving while also not taking crap from anyone will be a balance that you may never figure out but keep trying.
And if all of that fails.....just pretend you're Beyonce and you'll be just fine.
xoxo

California Part Deux

Long over due I know.  I finally have a day off and nothing else going on!!!

The next 2 days were filled with candy and family which are among my very favorite things on earth.  We went to the Jelly Belly factory which was so fun!  I will say I was unimpressed by the tour but the actual factory and ALL THE THINGS YOU CAN BUY were the greatest.

 I was obsessed with the jelly beans hanging everywhere

 Hanging jelly beans AND twinkle lights??? 

Stop.  Is this heaven?

This is the same face I use to get boys

We also got to visit with my Aunt Judi, Uncle Don, cousins, and of course my Oma and Opa.  I've mentioned them before and it was so nice being able to visit with them.  They told some amazing stories and I was constantly amazed by the pure and beautiful love my Opa has for my Oma.  Oh it was so glorious.

Sorry it's taken me so long to update.  I wish I was one of those people who got paid to write my blog but unfortunately I'm not and I have a paying job and friends who need my attention (they're sooo needy) but I have a few things planned coming up......a lot has been on my mind and as I'm sure you're aware....that's always a terrifying thing.  Thanks for reading my little family update!!!

xoxo

V

I Lost My Head and Left My Heart In San Francisco

Hello!
I thought I'd give you an update on the last couple of weeks!  I took a much needed break from life and took a road trip with my family to California.  My Oma and Opa and several of my family members live right outside the San Francisco area and we decided to visit.  It was MARVELOUS.  There's something about the ocean that I could just be lost in forever.  It centers me in some weird way.  My sister was able to come down from Seattle and we had the best time.  I'm so grateful for my family and for the ties that bind me here on this funny place called Earth.

Here's some pictures of all the fun!

Day 1 San Francisco
San Francisco is my favorite city in the world and it did not disappoint! Ok....it kind of did.....I will now present you with the saddest story in the world.
The day was beautiful, sunny, perfect temperatures.  When we went to go see the Golden Gate Bridge it turned cloudy, rainy, and foggy.  You couldn't even see it at all which was so sad.  The End.
We did go to Golden Gate park though and see the Japanese tea garden which was gorgeous!

 Sea Lions on Fisherman's Wharf

 Golden Gate Bridge

 Alcatraz

 Sad Golden Gate Bridge that you can't even see :(

Loved the stairs at the Golden Gate Bridge though.  "Welcome" in all languages.

 Family fun in the Japanese tea garden

I've decided to cut down on how many pictures you have to scroll through at once (I don't want to turn into your grandparents making you watch slides of their vacation) I will separate this trip into 3 different posts.  

That way you have something to look forward too.....you're looking forward to it right?....RIGHT?!

I thought so.

xoxo

V

Happy Things

I'm feeling a little sappy today.  I'm not sure why but I just feel very lucky and blessed.  I think of all the amazing people I have in my life and I seriously almost weep.  I spent the weekend with my group of friends who I feel so lucky to have.  We're a rowdy bunch and we rag on each other but we laugh hysterically and when it all came down to it....I know they'd be there for me if I needed them.  I love our Tuesday night bowling nights and our Sunday "after hours" chats.  Bonfires, movies, games.....they're good eggs.

Friend dinner!

 Bonfires in the mountains....

Saturday lunch club

 Karyn made me a survival kit for gift....

 Conference watching, Facebook hacking, food making...we did a lot this weekend

We take better selfies than Ellen does

And NOW I get to spend the rest of the week with my family!  We're taking a vacation to California to visit more family and I'm so excited!!!!

Ahhhh life is good.

Who are you thankful for in your life.  Tell them.  

 I'm thankful for all of you too!  Your comments make my day so thank you thank you.

xoxo

V