I had a lot of plans for my blog this week. I was going to make a list of all my favorite Clinique products. I was going to do a post on my favorite winter lipsticks. I was going to film a video. And then....life happened. Isn't it funny that even though blogs are supposed to be about our lives....I find it most difficult to blog about my "life life"...does that make sense? I am a very real person. What you see is what you get but...I like that my blog is "happy land". It's make up and sparkle, and laughter. But unfortunately that is not the reality of life. On Tuesday my dear friend Rebecca (who I used to work at the hospital with) posted on her Facebook that her son Jacob was being taken to the hospital with bleeding in his brain and was asking for prayers. When things like this happen to the people around you....you automatically assume that everything will be alright. Rebecca is a nurse and an amazing mother...things will be ok.
As the day and night progressed it became clear that was not how this story was going to end. The swelling in sweet Jacob's brain was too severe and today that beautiful, kind, gentle boy was pronounced brain dead. Rebecca and her husband made the courageous decision on behalf of Jacob to donate his organs so that even in death he could help people. As the updates on Jacob came through over Facebook, my heart broke more and more. I cried and laid in bed...and cried some more.
As most of you know....I know what losing a child does to a family. Not only are you trying to sort through the enormous pain and grief...but you have realities that you face such as....money. Funerals, medical expenses, time off work....no one has that kind of money. Rebecca is such a hard worker. Not only does she go above and beyond for her family, friends, and patients, but she's also kind, loving, and would do anything she could for someone. I found myself again (as I have so many times in my own life) asking why. Why would this happen to her. I just found myself aching, wishing I could take some of her hurt away.
Rebecca and I used to drive to and from work together. A lot of times she had her kids with her and as we all got to know each other better, I started babysitting for her kids. They are some of the most wonderful people you'd ever hope to meet. Jacob and his older brother Tyler and their 2 baby sisters Natalie and Emily. You just hurt for everyone. My friend Jamie posted something that I think perfectly put into words how I've been feeling.....
"We all prayed so hard for a miracle, and when I learned of Jacob's test results, I was at first so so sad, and angry, and disheartened. But when I had a moment to sit in silence, I think God may have whispered to me, because it dawned on me that SEVERAL miracles are happening. People are coming together to support a family in need, to lessen their burdens, to lift them up. Some of them complete strangers. Selflessly offering whatever they can- including Robert and Rebecca Planck- offering their precious child, to be someone else's miracle. People realizing it's time to straighten out their priorities in life. And my own little miracle, if I allow it, and I let go of my OWN expectations, and stop trying to "understand" everything, I can hear Him saying, "There truly is a Plan here; there truly is a Purpose for each and every life"
Rebecca and her family still need help. Rebecca only gets 3 paid days of bereavement from work and she is the major source of income for her family. I set up a page in memory of Jacob where people can donate money for funeral/medical/and time off for Rebecca and have linked it below. If you find that you feel the urge....please consider donating even just $5.00. You can even do so anonymously. Anything helps.
I must say I have been overwhelmed with the love that has been shown to their family by friends and strangers alike. I set up the page last night....it's been less than 24 hours and already $12,000 has been donated. It's just a drop in the bucket though as far as I'm concerned.
Thank you for taking the time to read. Thanks for sticking with me through the sticky stuff too. And if you come across any funny cat videos....send them my way. I could use a little cheering up.
Lot's of love