Thursday, November 4, 2010

things i've learned from watching Criminal Minds

1. If you go into your bathroom alone at will be murdered by a serial killer.
2. If all of a sudden your power goes will be murdered by a serial killer.
3. If you are folding laundry in your room and you have your headphones will be murdered by a serial killer.
4. If you are doing aerobics in the will be murdered by a serial killer.
5. If you are watching TV in the will be murdered  by a serial killer.
6. If someone comes to your door at night claiming they ran over a kitten and they need to use your phone but you all of a sudden can't turn on your porch will be murdered by a serial killer.
7. Everyone is a suspect, from little children to old one is off limits- they are all serial killers.
8. Don't give strangers a ride home...they are serial killers.
9. If sometimes your Dad disappears for long periods of time and your next door neighbor is a weird white guy who wears glasses.....they are both serial killers.
10. Don't eat chili at any kind of church function.  It probably has pieces of human flesh in it.  Because the guy who made it...yeah....he's a serial killer (and a cannibal).
11.  Homeless people and prostitutes are the first to go....they are serial killers.
12.  Hot guys are most likely serial killers
13. If your dog dies suddenly (along with other animals in the neighborhood) congratulations....your kid is a serial killer.
14. Stay away from pig farms in Canada...there are 2 brothers who live there....they are serial killers.
15. Remember Pony Boy Curtis from the Outsiders?  Yep...he's a serial killer.
16.. Hot black guys are not serial killers
17. Geeky white guys are all serial killers

Other Lessons:
- If Agent Hotchner is wearing a light blue shirt....they are about to solve the crime

-Jason Alexander is the creepiest human being to ever live on the face of the earth

-Agent Rossi is the most sarcastic human being to ever live on the face of the earth

- This guy...

should always be shirtless

It all boils down to this: never trust anyone....ever.

If you want to see an amazing clip about why FBI profilers are so awesome and why I call Agent Hotchner...Agent "HOT" this

1 comment:

Caren said...

Way more entertaining than creepy Criminal Minds!!

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