Remembering Tattoo Lizard guy...

I was recently looking back fondly on some memories I had of when I worked at the hospital and I remembered one patient in particular who I really liked.  He was this older man, biker type, tattoos.  I had expressed to him my desire to join the Hell's Angels and he gave me that look that said "well it's good you have dreams kid".

Then when I went into more specifics he laughed (with not at me right?!) and told me they'd be happy to have me.  They?  Was he including himself in this secret group of Bad-A motorcyclists?  I was basking in the glow that I may have in fact just met an actual member of the Hell's Angels and was considering asking him flat out when I noticed something.  I was drawing his blood and he had this huge tattoo on his arm.  This is the conversation that ensued.
Me: "Woah...that's a cool tattoo!"
Possible Hell's Angel: "Thanks...yeah I like it"
Me: "It looks like....a lizard?" (I was totally convinced I got it right)
Definite Hell's Angel (I had made a concrete decision about it at this point): "No...it's a portrait of my girlfriend...maybe that's why she punched me after I showed her?"
The nurse who was in the room with me erupted in laughter as I struggled to find the words to say.  I miss you Lizard tattoo Hell's Angel.

To read more of my crazy adventures working at the hospital....
like how I captured an invisible monkey {here}
or when I had my first experience taking a body to the morgue {here}

You're Welcome

Someone Better Do Something About That Monkey

The other night at work was an interesting one filled with one exciting event or another. My first exciting event happened when one of my patients started getting a bit...shall we say...forgetful? at around 11:30 pm. She was in there talking to "people" that weren't there. So I went in to check on her when she started yelling...here is how the conversation progressed...
*"Hey (fill in blank name here) is everything ok?"
~"Someone better do something about that monkey"
* "What monkey?"
~"That monkey over there by the window"
...clearly we all know there is no said monkey by the window...
*"I don't see a monkey over by your window"
~"Well he's there and somebody better do something about it"
at this point I figure I will completely play into her monkey fantasies...it's really easier than trying to convince her otherwise...
*"Oh that monkey! Yeah he's nice though he won't hurt you...you're in the hospital and you are safe I'll be back to check on you in a little while...try and get some sleep"
30 minutes pass...I am casually walking past the room and now the patient is talking very angrily and waving her arms
*"What's going on?"
~"There's this darn monkey in my bed and he's growling at me"
*"Oh really?"
~"Yes you shut up and get this monkey out of my bed!"
she's getting feisty now
*"Honey...I don't know how to get that monkey out of your bed..."
~"Well you better find someone who does!"
*"Ok I'll see what I can do..."
3 minutes pass and I re enter the room as the greatest invisible monkey catcher of all time...
*"Hi there (fill in the blank name) I heard you have a monkey problem? I'm here to take care of that for you..."
pretend to catch invisible monkey
*"Ok we've got him...I'm going to put him in this cage and we'll take care of him"
~"Well who does that monkey belong to?"
*"I'm not sure ma'am but we'll find out"
~"Yeah you better find out who is letting their monkey run around loose..where are you taking him?"
*"Well we'll probably take him to the zoo and then find out he belongs to ok?"
~"Yeah all right."

No more complaints of monkeys for the rest of the night. Who knew that catching invisible monkeys was in my job description...let alone something I would be so incredibly good at???
During that shift I also had a true blue celebrity as a patient and had another patient try to escape the floor in her birthday suit.
And no I don't work on the psych unit.

Once Upon A Time At the Hospital...

So I have a couple of stories to share and I guarentee NONE of you can one up me on these ones...

First...

On Sunday night we had another code. It was very sad and unexpected and the guy didn't make it. To make a long story short, the funeral home could not pick up his body until IOPO (Indiana Organ Procurement Organization) got a hold of the family for consent for donation. So he was just kind of hanging out...which I know sounds really gross. In the meantime we were told we were going to have an admit- a seizure patient that they needed this guy's room for. "Well what are we going to do with the body?" was the question on everyone's mind.

My clinical manager came down- who I love- and asked if I would help her transfer the body to another room...seriously?

Seriously.

So we move him to the back part of the unit- which is well known throughout the hospital for being haunted. (It's the old maternity floor and many nurses have heard babies crying before when the unit is quiet...and I once had a patient who was talking to babies in her room...creepy)

I was slightly disturbed.

THEN because it might be awhile until they can come get the body, we are told we are going to have to take him to the morgue.

So my friend Allison (who is a nurse) asks me if I'll go with her. So we go down, get the cart from the morgue (which is the creepiest and most disturbing place I've ever been to....I saw stuff in there I could have gone my whole life without seeing).

The morgue (or "body holding" which is what the sign says...yuck) is located in this concrete boiler room that also holds gardening tools and giant wooden slats...uh yes hello...Saw III? I think a scene from your movie is missing...

(not quite as bad as this but awful close...)

So we go back to get the guy to transfer him back down. At one point someone asks..."hey have you seen that movie 'Weekend At Bernie's?"

Nice.

So we finally get him all situated and we hear this "beep beep....beep beep"

and Allison asks me "is that your watch?"

I say..."no...."

because it wasn't...

we look down...

it was HIS watch...

I made a face that was very similar to this one...

Finally we are able to leave and of course when we DIDN'T have a body- security was there within 2 minutes to let us in but when we do have one it takes them 15 minutes to come down while we are just hanging out in the creepy concrete room hoping the lights all don't shut off and we start hearing carnival music or something.

It was disturbing.

Now for story number 2

Last night I walk into one of my patient's rooms. I hear that he is maybe using the urinal in bed so I stand back to give him some privacy. All of a sudden he pulls out his drinking cup from in between his legs and sets it on his bedside table. I can hear the ice still swishing around in the cup. I look down at the cup...sure enough...yellow.

I ask "Sir, did you just urinate in your drinking cup?"

His response "Yep."

Anyone order the "Pee on the Rocks?"

I love my job.

101 and I'm a plebotomist!

Wow everyone this is my 101 post! Can you believe it? I sure can't!

In other news...

I am a phlebotomist

Officially

I can now draw your blood. Just let me know...you can come on over and experience my magical needle stick.

You know you want to.

A Bad Beginning...A Better End

I had the worst beginning of a week ever. I went to work Sunday night. Things were busy but they were going ok. I had this patient who I had been taking care of for quite some time. She had come in for an ankle fracture and when they went to do her surgery she had coded while on the operating table. They figured she had had a stroke. She ended up being in the ICU for about a week to 2 weeks and then she was transferred back down to our floor. I had gotten to know her sister and her family that frequently came up to stay with her. Because of her stroke she wasn't doing very well...she was unresponsive and didn't move around on her own. Well Sunday night when I went in there to take care of her again she had been doing a lot better. She had been responding to questions, moving around on her own, following commands. I went in to take her morning vitals and everything was fine. I left her room and went into another. 9 minutes later her sister came out and said..."I don't think she's breathing". So we ran in there and she was totally unresponsive. We started chest compressions, got the crash cart, and called a code blue. I was in there helping for awhile but ended up going back out with her family. Her sister was sitting at the nurses station crying and I was doing my best to comfort her. 30 minutes later- the doctor came out and told us she was dead. I was floored. I had JUST been in there. What didn't I see? What could I have done? We are taught that when a patient dies you have to check out and be there for the family. It's their time to mourn, not yours. You have to check your emotions at the door which can be a very difficult thing to do. I still had work to do though and so I finished and came home. I started bawling almost immediately. I emailed my Grandma (who is a retired nurse) to talk to her about her experiances...all the time while wiping tears and snot from my face. I could not stop thinking about her and her family. Unfortunately I had to go back to work Monday night. I was dreading it. I was sick to my stomach all day. How could I go and work in that place where that had happened. It was one of those things where you leave and you see all these people just going about thier usual business and you think "how can you be normal when this horrible thing happened?" and then you realize that this happens every minute of every day. Someone loses someone they love. We don't ever think about that though. It was kind of a daunting thing. It made me think about his quote from the movie "Shall We Dance".

“We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? You need someone to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. Someone to say 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'.”

It has really made an affect on my life. I will never forget it. I will never forget that womans name or her family's faces.
Monday night at work one of the clinical managers let me take blood (even though I'm technically not supposed to yet). I think she felt bad about my horrible night. Well it didn't necessarily make up for it but it was still totally awesome.
On one hand I hope that I will get used to this. On the other- when you stop feeling emotion when things like this happen just because you are "used" to it...doesn't that make you less of a human?
It will be an interesting journey to find out the answer to that question.

Dante's Inferno

Has anyone read Dante's Inferno? It's very interesting. It's basically about all the different levels of hell and who will end up there and what will happen in that circle of hell. One night at work another tech and I were comparing the different units of the hospital to the different levels of hell like Dante's Inferno. Last night I got floated to the third floor. Or in other words....Level 8.
Here is a description of the punishment one would experience in a level 8 situation...and I quote
"Eternally walking and tormented. Living in excrement. Stuffed into holes. Heads turned backwards. Boiling tar. Lead capes. Snakes. Flames."
The bold and larger words would be key in the reason why the 3rd floor is level 8. I actually do like that floor in some weird and twisted way. It is the medical/renal/oncology floor...a lot of sadness, depression, and inevitable death. Right around 4 am I experienced my first code blue. Very strange. I kind of felt like I was in an episode of ER. And I felt pretty cool. But it's a lot more real than TV when the patient gets transfered to the ICU and codes again and you just think...wow this person was alive 15 minutes ago and now everything is about to change.
Needless to say it was a long and busy night. I'm hurting from head to toe from running up and down 3 flights of stairs all night....so...it's off to my own version of Level 6 which punishment is "Living in smoking tombs"...in my case the tomb is a bed...my bed to be specific and I will be living in it until 7pm tonight at least.

A Moment Like This

Have you ever had that moment where you know you are exactly where you were meant to be and doing exactly what you were meant to do?
This morning at 7 am I had that moment.
I was standing at the nurses station waiting to give report. The only noises where nurses on the computer looking up labs and the hum of an IV pump in a nearby room. I just stood there looking around me amazed that I was there knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that it is where I belong.
Eventually everyone showed up and it turned into mass chaos as report started and 3 call lights went off and such but in that rare quiet moment- I felt complete.

Working Hard or Hardly Working?

I never update my blog anymore, reasons for this neglect include:
1. I work too much
2. We do not currently have internet at home
3. I work a lot
4. No one reads my blog anyway
5. My life is boring and I don't go anywhere because....
6. I am always working

I had probably the worst night ever at the hospital on Thursday night. The worst part about it was that I wasn't even scheduled to work...I picked up a shift...so instead of feeling like I wanted to take a needle and stab my (or someone else who shall remain nameless) eye out- I could have been home watching other FAKE people's hospital drama like on ER or Grey's Anatomy.
Very exasperating.
On another work note...I don't know if I posted this spring but I have many (mis) adventures....in fact that should probably be the title of my blog "The Many (Mis) Adventures of Vanessa"- a lot of these misadventrues happen when I am working at the salon for some reason and usually involves me doing something I am not a. particularly skilled in and b. is not in my job description- and for some reason it usually involves being outside. (Previous misadventures include watering the flowers here a work and oh yeah...the slight incident involving the balcony that we aren't talking about anymore....).
I digress.
So this morning we got our first real big SNOW which is cool- except when you have to walk/drive in it. And it is only pretty for like 12.4 minutes and then it ends up being brown and dirty and your feet are always cold and the bottom of your jeans are wet- I have mixed feelings about snow. I know you are thinking "On with the effin story already" which reminds me...I should probably be tested for ADD.
Ok so for real this time. We got our first snow and I went into work at the salon. Well with snow also comes the possibiliy of slipping and increasing the amount of possible injury. We don't like that because we don't want to be responsible. So...I volunteered (as always...before thinking) to salt outside. Well I had to shovel the fallen snow first. I go out and let me tell you- my hair looked ADORABLE today (if I do say so myself) and I forgot to put on socks with my super cute flats (ok maybe I didn't actually forget but socks would have ruined the outfit)- so I went out sans socks on my feet and my super cute "I'm about to get ruined by falling wet snow" hair and started shoveling. My nose started running, my hair got flat, my feet got cold, and I as usual was wondering why these things happen when a guy (namely my boss's son) isn't around to do it for me. Oh well.
Also at work today I heard the song "Feliz Navidad". I hate that song. "Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad prospero ano y felicidad...I wanna wish you a merry christmas, I wanna wish you a merry christmas, I wanna wish you a merry christmas from the bottom of my heart". There were all the words to that song. Repeat 50 billion times and then slash your wrists. Stupid stupid song. It sucks you into this vortex and it pulls you in with it's false promises of being fun and cultural, when in reality the song ends and you wonder why on earth you just wasted 3 minutes of your life listening to it. It sneaks up on you everytime with no warning. And all it takes is the first 4 seconds to play and you have it in your head ALL DAY. Like I do now because I was talking about it.
I think I'm getting grumpy.
I need a nap.
One of the other side effects of working too much.
Sigh.

Peace at Last

So it finally happened. I experienced my first "death of a patient". For a long time we have had a patient who was very sick and came from a hospice situation basically to die. She was a sweet old woman. I cared for her last week when she first came in and I cared for her this morning at 2:24 am when she passed away. We learned about this in our class and we all knew eventually there may come a day when a patient we cared for died....but I wasn't really expecting it to happen to me. I work with mostly joint patients and unless there is a huge unforeseeable event...my patients are usually just fine. But for some reason yesterday when I went to bed after my shift I had a dream that this patient died while I was there and I could visualize caring for her and cleaning her after she died (how morbid is that???). Around midnight or so I was telling the nurses and the other tech about my dream and we were talking about how strange it was. I had decided it was anxiety but 2 hours later it actually happened. Very eerie. After it happened I went in and cleaned her and it was a strange but spiritual experience....preparing a body for a soul who has already passed. I didn't personally know her but I cared about her all the same and when the funeral home came to take her body I found myself tearing up. It was more because I was wondering if that is how my grandma left this world. If the funeral home came and got her. Who was with her? How was she feeling? I miss my Mam more than words could ever explain. I think about her all the time while working at the hospital. Hoping that the way I care for these people is the way someone cared for my Mam when I couldn't be there. Anyway...it's been an eventful week. Seeing how fragile life really is. One minute here...the next gone. I found a quote that I really liked.

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity"
-Gilda Radner

That is how I want to live my life. Making the best of each moment.
What a week.
Birth of a baby who I already love and the death of someone who could have been my own loved one.
For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven.
A time to be born, and a time to die.
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted.


I couldn't have said it better myself.

Burning the Midnight Oil

Wow...where to start. I feel like ever since I started working night shift I am literally dead to the world. I go to work at 11 and work all night until 7 am, come home fall into my bed by 8 get up at 2:30 and get ready for work at the salon and at 11 I rinse and repeat the whole process...so to say. It's been crazy, I frequently forget what day it is and sometimes I will realize it has been 24 hours since I have eaten anything... but it has been so great too. There have been some hard nights...2 nights ago we had a patient crash and go into kidney failure (keep in mind this was Saturday night...when I then I had to get up and go to church the next morning, teach sharing time, teach my Sunbeams, and all this without the help of my dear sister...). BUT there have been some great nights too. Last night I had a patient who took a great liking to me and was calling me into her room literally every 20 minutes AND she would call me by name and she was telling all the nurses "oh Vanessa knows how to do it, she knows the way I like it, no one does it like Vanessa"...it was cracking me up. This job above all else has taught me the value of service. I am there for people in their weakest state when their families can't and they trust me to attend to their needs and take care of them. What an awesome responsibility. I love love love it.
And can I just admit to the world right now what a huge dork I am? I actually had my family tape the football game for me last night because I couldn't watch it...when did I turn into such a guy? But the Colts won! Yeah!
In closing I would like to publicly apologize for being so anti social. But it probably won't change anytime soon because no one does it like me! :)
Also here is a picture of the delicious cake my darling mother made for me...rainbow chip of course! Thanks Mom...it's nice to know that even after 22 years you let me have the cake of a 10 year old and don't think twice about it (at least out loud...)
*Please make special note of the most fabulous birthday gift ever bestowed upon someone in the background...that is right ladies and gentlemen...it is a one of a kind...(sort of...), magically versatile...the one, the only, the...Magic Bullet! I have been lusting after this little beauty for about 3 years now and my friends got it for me! They are the best and I've already make some delicious concoctions in this baby.

Halloween, Birthdays, and a Graduation!

So I must admit...I harbor some resentment towards Halloween. This stems from a childhood where my birthday has been 6 days before this ridiculous holiday. All growing up birthday parties consisted of costumes or witches brew (ok so that was actually pretty good...) and then as I got older I had to plan MY birthday party around the ghoolish parties that my friends had to go to. Seriously? So...I tend to try and forget that Halloween even exists...which is hard when your doorbell rings a billion times on October 31st. BUT when my Aunt Brita sent us a package filled with popcorn that turns orange and HOT CHOCOLATE that turns orange (in true Halloween spirit...) I had to try it. Bub was so excited he was dancing all around the kitchen while we made it...it turned out very tasty and we got to snuggle down and munch on popcorn and drink cocoa and watch a movie. What a great Friday night date!

Our poor Murphy LOVES popcorn and kept resting his head on my leg begging for a taste...it is just irresistable I suppose.




I graduated from the PSP program today!!! Yay! I got a 98% on my test and passed all my clinical stuff off too. It was bittersweet because I will miss my class...and George.


It was also the debut of my new hair color...I am still getting used to it...I like it but I will always be a blonde at heart...

Tomorrow is my birthday...woo woo! I'll be a fabulous 22 years old...yay me!
I am going to spend the weekend with some friends and I think we may be seeing the new High School Musical movie (obviously I am actually turning 12.)

Little Red Corvette...

I absolutely love Prince. I love him. And I love the song Little Red Corvette...which doesn't really have anything to do with this blog post but I just wanted to tell you....
and I did entertain my PSP class a couple times with my very own performance of this delightful tune...which does tie into my post today...

I love meeting new people and I love making friends and I was nervous going into this whole experiance that I wouldn't like it or that I would have no friends but I am so blessed because I made new friends with everyone in my class and they have a completely ridiculous sense of humor just like me so....that has been fabulous!

This is my class with my new love George...

Me and Kathie

I have more pictures to prove how incredible hilarious we all are...

We took George and put him up in this chair complete with stethoscope, coffee mug, pen, nametag...and our instructor didn't notice for a good 5 minutes that George was listening in on the class...it was so funny.

George and I had a photoshoot together....it's meant to be.

It is a little known fact that I have VERY long arms. One of my greatest talents is being able to be on my knees in front of the refridgerator and being able to touch the top. I can touch the ceilings in our house...and I pride myself on having longer arms than any guy I know. So one day in class we were talking about it and they said that your foot is the same length as the distance between your wrist and the crook of you elbow....meaning that I would have some very long feet. I was like "seriously guys....my arms are freakishly long...that won't work for me". Of course I had to prove it and we just happened to get a picture....there is still quite a bit of distance there. The one downside to this is that I can never find long sleeves that cover my arms...as evidenced in this picture...

All in all it has been a blast and I couldn't be more happy. Yesterday I had clinical and was on the Ortho side of the Ortho/Neuro/Spine unit and I loved every minute of it. We had some of the sweetest patients I have ever met. Sometimes it's hard and the shall we say...odors...are overwhelming but the look on these peoples faces or their families faces and they way they thank you over and over for what you do for them....really makes it worth it.

New Job by the Numbers...

#of days a week I wake up at 5 am : 5

# of rooms I work in at the hospital: 48

# of times I cried last week: 2

# of times it took me to finally get a correct blood pressure: 7

# of my PSP classmates: 8

# of new friends I've made: 8

# of questions I missed on my CPR test: 0

# of diet cokes it takes to get through the day: 7 (this is a rough estimate)

# of times I change my clothes: 2 (change from scrubs to professional dress for salon....tiring!)

# of times I cleaned up poop on my first day: 3

# of hours I clocked working last week (this includes hospital and salon): 72

# of times I laugh through out the day: too many to count

# of soulmates I've met since working: 1 (see picture below)

All in all it has been an incredible experiance so far. I only have 2 days of classes left and the rest are all clinicals on my actual unit. I will be sad to leave all the friends I've made but I'm excited about all the new experiances I will have. I won't lie...I've been exausted. I went to bed at 8:30 pm last Friday night (ridiculous right???) but it will all be worth it! I'll keep you updated! :)

Lifestyle of a PSP

Wow...what a week it has been and it is only Wednesday!!!

Here is a run down of the week's events...

Monday was my first official day at the hospital. I sat through 8 hours of orientation...listening to people talk...but I did bond with my table mates...2 RN's so I will never see them...but it was fun while it lasted.

Tuesday was just a nursing orientation so it was all the people who would be doing patient care. We listened a lot in the AM and in the PM we got to do these skill stations where we learned about code blues/crash carts isolation rooms moving and lifting patients AND tuberculosis mask fittings which were all very interesting and we got out really early. Let me tell you something though...both of these days started BEFORE 0700 (which is 7am for those of you unfamiliar with military time...which I am now VERY familiar with...) so I went directly from the hospital (in my HOT new scrubs that I bought...pictures to be posted later) to my other job at THE PARIS SALON and worked until 2100...got home at 2130 and then had a bunch of reading to do. I crashed right around 2245 and slept soundly until 0545 (you catching on now???)

Wednesday (today) which was really fun. We split into our acutal PSP class today. There are 9 of us and we had a blast. We started out the morning learning a lot of policies (yawn) and then learned about ostomys and emptying ostomy and foley bags (GROSS...if you don't know what that is...count yourself lucky). We breaked for lunch and THEN...the good stuff.

CHECKING GLUCOSE LEVELS

(aka blood sugar)

which we got to do with ACCUCHEC which is that finger prick thing you do at the Dr. office. I received one and gave one. I am happy to report that my glucose level was a 90 which is normal range. It was so cool. I practically felt like a DR.

Then we went over medical terminology/abbreviations.

Do you know what an MI stands for?

CBC?

b.i.d.?

FBS?

I do.

We had a little quiz at the beginning to see which terms we already knew and I was finished in like 2 minutes (before everyone else and I'm then only one in class with NO previous health care training). My instructor was really surprised when she was reading through it and was like "Vanessa...how do you know all this when you haven't even worked in the setting before? I'm impressed"...

My answer???

"Um..ER"

That's right DAD...one of my shows ACTUALLY came in handy for once.

So then I rushed from there today at 4:30 back to the salon where I will be until 9:00 or later...

I'm exausted.

Or maybe I just have S & S of exaustion?

Hmm...

Hit Me With Your Best Shot...

Oh the pure joyness of getting a wellness check before you start a job at the hospital (did you happen to hear the hint of sarcasm in my tone? It was subtle so I was just checking...). I arrived promptly at 9:15 am to the hospital and completed my required paperwork forms (as a disclaimer can I just say that it was a very early morning for a night owl like myself...I mean do people really get up at 7:15?...and also as a disclaimer for my grumpiness- I did not enjoy the blissfulness that comes with drinking diet coke this moring which is my coffee and gets me through the day...so just give me some understanding ok?)

Moving on...at 9:45 I had my wellness check appointment. The RN who helped me was a male and I had to try so hard to not laugh out loud because the term "male nurse" reminds me of the movie "Meet The Parents"...and the nurse's name happened to be Greg and I was thisclose to asking him if his real name was Gaylord...I was feeling sorta sassy (please see diet coke reference above)...but I refrained. So we went through an eye sight test which I passed after a slight misunderstanding about half circles (insert long drawn out story that makes me look like a dumb blonde).
Then he takes me into the bathroom...and I guess he expected me to pee in a cup but I didn't know this was going to happen so...I have problems peeing on command. We who suffer from this problem call it "bladder shy" and it's a serious and debilitating illness. So not to go into too much detail but my first attempt was not good enough so dear ol' Greg got me some water so I could try again later. In the mean time he gave me a TB test and drew like a billion tubes of blood. So after being felt up by a strange Dr. (so not a pleasant thing) and wearing a gown that was made out of paper towels (I'm not kidding)...I was cleared for being eligible to be an employee. Well I still didn't have to pee and I couldn't leave without doing so...so I got more water. The drinking of the water is a whole story in and of itself.
The water was the following things:
1.)warm
2.)gross
3.)maybe toilet water
So after having to drink 2 tall glasses of it...I wanted to say "Hey Greg...I still don't have to pee but I might be about to throw up from the nasty hospital water you made me drink..."...but once again I decided to curb my attitude even though at this point I'm going through serious caffeine withdrawal.
In the end I was able to succussfully deliver them the specimen they needed and I was cleared to go (Yay for being drug free!!!)
And what did I get out of this whole ordeal? 2 bruises on my arm from needles and one sexy pair of nurses shoes. Go me.

*Hot nurse shoes provided by Debbie Orcutt
*All sarcastic comments provided by yours truly.

Scrub-tastic!

Can I just say that one of the most exciting parts of my new job is that I get to wear scrubs??? I'm SO looking forward to it. I am so excited that I bought a set today. They are very cute...and maybe a bit pricier than the other pairs I will buy in the future...but they are my first pair so I decided to splurge.

Also on Friday at my meeting I get my picture taken for my new badge that I get to wear at the hospital...I'm thinking that I may wear my badge around the house for days and days...and out in public too...maybe WITH my new scrubs...now there's a good idea!

Oh I love my life.

Paging Dr. Nelson

Ok...so I'm not a Dr...yet. But you're looking at the newest member of Community North Hospital's PSP program. That's right...it's official ladies and gentlemen. I was officially offered the position this morning. I'll be working night shift in the Ortho/Neuro unit starting out part time but hopefully they'll have the need for me to be full time soon. Orientation starts October 6th!!! What a relief to know that in a couple of weeks I'll be making more money AND having full health benefits. My Heavenly Father really took the reins on this one...and I couldn't be more grateful. To find a job that is going to open so many doors for me and provide me the education I need as well...oh life is good.

In other news...we had our Primary Program yesterday in church and let me tell you...WHAT A RELIEF! Trying to corral 10 Sunbeams on the stands is not an easy task. The kids loved being able to talk into the microphone but while waiting for our second part they got a little restless. Katie Marble wanted to sit on my lap (then she wanted to sit with Kalia, then she wanted to stand up, then she wanted to go sit with her mom....) she is such a sweetheart though. Then there was sweet sweet Layton McMahon who has the most precious face he can melt your heart in .3 seconds. He has a fascination with his mouth in the sense that he was licking the chair in front of him, eating my sister's bracelet (sorry Calah), and when it was his turn to say his part he promtly stuck the mic in his mouth....nice. Nathan Battraw is just a bundle of energy and wanted nothing to do with the whole thing...poor kid...I felt his pain. The kids' part was to tell something they are thankful for and I have to say Jacob Griffiths was probably my favorite...the delivery was the best part. Clear as day he proudly says "I'm thankful for cereal" oh Jacob aren't we all??? Kaia Wilson is a force to be reckoned with and when she says something she means it...so when she adamently told Diana Talbot that "it is NOT our turn to sing!!!"...she meant business. Diana was heartbroken and I looked over at her and her big blue eyes were welling with tears...every nerve in my body went into panic mode (Abort! Abort! 4 year old about to cry....)so I quickly had her come over to me and assured her that we would be singing shortly. All in all...it wouldn't matter if the kids all shouted and screamed and ran around the stage the entire time (which they didn't...thankfully)...I would still adore them. It is impossible to be frustrated with this bunch because they are really and truly just so fantastic. I have so much fun with them and love being their teacher...there is just something about those Sunbeams.
Well that's all for me...I have a day off work so I'll be able to get a lot done (ie watching Beverly Hills 90210) :)

Equations, Endorphins, and The Jonas Brothers...

What more could you want in a blog right??? So...to create some clarity into the blog topic today I would like to share with you a dream I had last night...go ahead grab some popcorn...maybe a cold beverage...if it involves the Jo Bro's you know it's going to be good...
I suppose I should learn to go to bed earlier or meditate or something because last night's dream took me to places that I didn't even know my subconscious could go. Ok..on with the dream.
Picture if you will me being married to a Jonas Brother...Joe Jonas to be specific (I know...but try really hard)...this is how my dream starts out. I am married to Joe Jonas while helping the younger Jonas...Nick...with some dating show he is on (please don't ask why I know their names and kindly overlook the fact that I previously referred to them as the Jo Bros)
So being so caught up in Jonas mania I completely forget about my interview/test on Wednesday. So at 8:15...the time I have to leave...I'm not even dressed yet. So I rush to get ready and then remember it's professional dress so I have to change. Then I'm quickly trying to review *this is where the equation part of the story comes in* and I'm panting and sweating and freaking out. So I woke up disoriented, was harboring angry feelings towards Joe Jonas, and trying desperately to solve for y.
I am losing my mind.
On other news I made up my mind that I'm going to start walking again. Anyone remember when I lost 15 pounds in February??? Yeah I hardly do either...so I'm going to start again. Unfortunately my lame sisters aren't helping me out. I tried in my sweetest voice to convince them that getting up at 7 am to exercise was fun! (yeah they didn't buy it). I think the exercise and the endorphins could really come in handy right now because I am so obviously way too stressed...and I really don't want to dream about math EVER again... I'm just kind of concerned that I will lose the motivation I have now and be right back where I started....maybe I'll call up my husband Joe and see what he suggests...

Exciting News!

I wanted to say that I am so excited because I got the job at the hospital that I've been dying for! I'll be going to an information session on August 6th and I'll have to take an entry level exam (high school reading, language, and math) to be able to get it so the job is conditional on me passing....which kind of makes me nervous because if I don't pass I can't re-apply for another 6 months...bummer. But I'm studying hard and getting ready and I feel confident. I can't wait to get my foot in the door to do what I love!!!