Isn't That Something?

The first person who saw your face was delighted by you. Isn’t that something? You managed to bring joy only by breathing. 
Your mother will occasionally peek through the cracks of your door when you are sleeping, even now, to make sure that she can see the movements of your chest. 
The boy who kissed you in the park last night isn’t in love with you, he won’t even stay, but he meant every second of those minutes. 
You’ll walk a city street that your feet have never touched before and you’ll be terrified of getting lost and that feeling is what’ll help you find the way home. 
You’ll give your money to a homeless man and he will hold your hand firmly between his and he will say ‘thank you so, so much’ and isn’t that something?
There’s a piece of music that makes your heart feel like it’s bleeding. Listen to it. Listen to it again. 
When was the last time you paused to stare at night time? 
Did you know that there is at least one person in your life who will jump in front of a hail of bullets for you, without your asking. 
Your entire body is made of nerves. Feel things. 
Take walks in places you’ve never been. 
Take photographs of people not everyone considers beautiful. Find loveliness in them. 
Let go of the things that are killing you from the inside out. 
One day you’re going to be part of the sky, you’re going to be that beautiful and that necessary but not today. Not today.

Be Soft

I stumbled across this quote again recently and it's always been a favorite of mine.  It always makes me stop and think.  A few years ago I had a tendency to be very abrasive, hard, maybe a lot little like a word that rhymes with itch and has a B at the beginning?  Maybe just at bit......

 I saw sweetness and gentleness as weakness.  That if I was nice or friendly then people would think they could just walk all over me.  I'd be the "sweet girl" and I wanted to be the tough chick. I don't really know what changed.  Life experiences?  Maturity?  Both? I am now the person who annoys the group of friends because I can't just judge and bitch about other people anymore.  I always see the other side to everyone's story.  I used to be the person who my family called a robot.  Now it hurts me when they say that because I feel things so strongly with and for other people.  I CRY WATCHING SWIFFER COMMERCIALS.  I'm soft.  I don't mind being sweet because I no longer equate it with being weak.  I equate it with being strong.  Strong enough to be soft and know that it's ok because I'm still confident who I am.  

I think it's something we all learn eventually.  I used to want to be the girl that people were afraid of because of how much I didn't care.  Now I just want to be the girl that anyone could talk to and who everyone can say "she's so nice!".  I don't mind being that person and I challenge everyone to be the same.  It's ok to be nice.  It's ok to be approachable.  Be strong, be confident, be sweet.  It's all ok.  I heard another quote that has quickly climbed the ranks as an all time favorite of mine

"We need women who are so strong they can be gentle, so educated they can be humble, so fierce they can be compassionate, so passionate they can be rational, and so disciplined they can be free."

-Kavita Ramdas

I love that.  That is what I aspire to be.  Any thoughts you have on the topic?  Any other thoughts on your mind?  Let's learn and grow together! :)

Leave a comment! 

xoxo

V

Reunited and it feels so good.....

Hi friends!  I know!  Quite the hiatus!  I was trying to think of what to write about as like a...."welcome back" so to speak....should it be fashion?  make up?  an open letter to Bradley Cooper accepting his marriage proposal???  The possibilities seemed endless....and then I went off Diet Coke for a week (yeah I know...again) and had a mental breakdown and did something crazy and even though it's super personal.....I'm going to share with you!  We're all friends here anyway right?
Do you guys remember how emotionally charged "Heads Up 7 Up" was in elementary school?  For those of you who didn't play this game and think I'm crazy...here's a quick description.  So "Heads Up 7 Up" was like a roller coaster ride ESPECIALLY if your crush was one of the ones picking people and YOU were chosen.  And you stood up and crossed your fingers so hard that they were the ones who chose you and this was the start of your forever (yes....I was a semi-dramatic 9 year old)  The terrible thing they never tell you is that anytime you have feelings for someone it's going to be the same feeling.  Love is not a battlefield, it's a game of Heads Up 7 Up and we're all just hoping that the person we've picked has already picked us.
Where am I going with this?  Well recently I had these feelings for someone.  This is how I usually react when I have feelings for someone: I get weird.  I actually put a TON of distance between me and that person so that NO ONE will start to pick up on how I feel which makes absolutely no sense but it's what a lot of us do.  This time I did something completely out of the norm.....and I told that person about how I was feeling.
And it was TERRIFYING.
I will be honest with you...this did not end up exactly ideally but it wasn't terrible and there is a HUGE freedom in just saying what you're feeling!  So I guess I tell this story just because it was a huge lesson for me.  Saying how you're feeling is never going to ruin you.  Yes at times you could feel uncomfortable or awkward but the actual pain comes from the regret of the unsaid.
Whatever you need to say....say it.  Don't wait.  Apologize, say "I love you"....whatever it is.  You will never regret it.  I promise.
On that note....I have some things I need to say to Adam Levine that can't wait and that I almost certainly WILL regret....
I hope you're all doing well.  Thanks for sticking around....look forward to an actual update filled with pictures and news!  Yeah...I know you're looking forward to that.  I leave you now with a picture of me and my dog....because I know you've missed these.
Right?

eat pray love

I watched this movie last night

I found it to be incredibly inspiring.  It really made me think about the delicate balance we all try to develop in life.  And it further proved to me that most things we do....need to have a spiritual element to create that balance.  A spiritual relationship with food, with prayer, with love.  There was a line in the movie that said "Americans know entertainment but they do not know pleasure".  So true.  We work ourselves to the bone.  Run ourselves completely out of steam.  And on our days off....we're still working.  Laundry, dishes etc...or we are lounging in front of the TV or browsing Facebook.  I am incredibly guilty of this (see past blogs on American Idol, Teen Mom, everything Jon Hamm....you get the picture).  How often do we stop.  Just pause.  In the middle of a meal to really enjoy what we are eating.  When we have a quiet moment.  How often do we "meditate"?  I use the term meditate lightly because I am the most easily distracted person of all time.  I've paused at least 3 times during writing this to see what was on TV.  But I think we need to take that time.  To learn about ourselves and to create a healthy relationship with ourselves, with God, with food, with others.
Something to think about as we all busily finish out the remainder of our week.  Take time, pause, meditate.  Even if it's just for 5 minutes.  Try to shut the world and thoughts out.  Just be peaceful.  I'm going to try and I hope you all will as well.

In the end, I've come to believe in something I call "The Physics of the Quest." A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you're brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you. 

- Liz Gilbert: Eat, Pray, Love

lesson learned

Here's a lesson I learned tonight.
Be careful what you say and what you share.  Everyone doesn't always wish you well unfortunately.
Also...working with a lot of women...is really hard.

The End.

just a reminder

For when your (my)  hair is doing that funky thing, none of your (my) clothes look right, and your (my) make up looks like that of a Vegas showgirl for no apparent reason.
Sometimes we all need a reminder that it's what's on the inside that counts.

Even if what's on the inside is mostly Diet Cherry Dr. Pepper

"You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left."

Immortal words to live by.

“Be who you are and say what you feel: because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” From the wonderful mind of Dr. Seuss.
Having a terribly silly day today. I don’t mind, and I don’t know that it matters. But it is what it is, all the same, all the same. 


Also I'm totally rocking it at work.  Just thought I'd add that...

recoleta

Is it weird for me to say that I really love cemeteries? (clarification- I love cemeteries where no one I know are there)
I just think they are so beautiful and peaceful.  The words people leave to describe the ones they love.  Words like beloved or precious. How did the ones they left behind choose to describe them after they were gone?
You can feel the love that people have for one another at a cemetery.

One cemetery in particular is the Recoleta Cemetery in Buenos Aires.  It's almost like a village.  The iron carvings, the statues.  The time and care these people took so that the people they cared about had a beautiful place to rest just astounds me.  I will admit that while looking at pictures of this place I was listening to a song "The Beacon" by A Fine Frenzy. The words of the song seemed to match the images and I even teared up a little bit. 
Missing someone, loving someone, wishing they were here but knowing they are better where they are.  These are all emotions that we've experienced before.  Gloria Vanderbilt once said that loss is what unites us as people. And she's right. We all have or will lose someone we care tremendously for. We are woven together by sorrow.  It's something to think about when going through life.  To treat people well and good.  You have no idea what they are going through.
Anyway I'll step down from my soap box now and share with you some images from this breathtaking place. 

and the song...

The Recoleta Cemetery

(Recoleta means retired or recollect)

(the entrance...can you guess what that means?)

*Eva Peron was buried here also..just a fun fact

‘I have learnt how to live…how to be in the world and of the world, and not just to stand aside and watch.”

Audrey Hepburn, Sabrina 1954

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I'm not going
to let anybody see you.
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pour whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that he's in there.
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay down, do you want
to mess me up?
you want to screw up the works?
you want to blow my book sales in
Europe?
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too clever, I only let him out
at night sometimes
when everybody's asleep.
I say, I know that you're there,
so don't be sad.
then I put him back,
but he's singing a little in there,
I haven't quite let him die
and we sleep together like that
with our secret pact
and it's nice enough to make a man weep,
but I don't weep,
do you?

-Charles Bukowski

Bloodline

This is absolutely without a doubt my favorite song of the moment. It is called "Bloodline" by Matt Morris. It is so deep and beautiful. Really listen to the lyrics...



What are your interpretations/impressions?

All Creatures of our God and King

We sang this hymn in church today and I really really love it. It's just so spiritual and praising-ish (ya know because that is a word).

All creatures of our God and King, Lift up your voice and with us sing
Aleluia! Aleluia!

Thou burning sun with golden beam


Thou silver moon with softer gleam


Aleluia! Aleluia! Aleluia! Oh praise Him! Aleluia!

Hope is the thing with feathers

That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune--without the words,
And never stops at all

-Emily Dickinson

more love

Just look out around us people fighting their wars they think they'll be happy when they've settled their scores. Let's lay down our weapons that hold us apart be still just a minute try to open our hearts. More love I can hear our hearts crying. More love I know that's all we need. More love to flow in between us to take us and hold us and lift us above. If there's ever an answer it's more love.

top of the world

I wished I'd had known you, wished I had shown you all the things I was on the side. Cause everyone's singing we just wanna be heard disappearing everyday without so much as a word somehow. I think I broke the wings off a little songbird and she's never gonna fly to the top of the world now.
-Patty Griffin

“I built a fort in the middle of trees, and those trees will watch over me.”

daughters

Fathers, be good to your daughters. Daughters will love like you do. Girls become lovers who turn into mothers. So mothers, be good to your daughters too.

I've always loved John Mayer's music. His song "Daughters" is one of his best.