Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Cancer, Werewolf, or Barry Gibb?

That is the question.
So lately right around 2am I have started spiking a fever. Like 100.1 fever. Just at night. So strange. I noticed it about a week ago. So naturally I went into work at the hospital and started asking around...what could it be? No one could tell me. What good is working at a hospital if the best health advice they can give you is "go to the Dr." thanks for NOTHING guys. So anyway...I turned to my next best option. Web M.D. The place where anyone can be a Dr.! So I listed my symptoms and the options were endless....viral meningitis, lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, mono, tuberculosis, syphilis...I mean really any of those were possibilities. My favorite part was that they ask if the fever came in conjunction with "coming in contact with anyone with an infectious illness"....uh no maybe just EVERY NIGHT AT A HOSPITAL WITH 30 PATIENTS!
Isn't it funny how when you are trying to diagnose yourself suddenly you have had EVERY symptom. I was going through the list thinking....yeah I HAVE had that. One of my other symptoms was fatigue...so clearly I'm thinking Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. I mean that must be the only reason for my symptoms. Fatigue= cancer right? (Thanks Mom)

Thinking that I might get more info from a search engine I cleverly Googled the term "night fevers".
My options were
1. Night sweats and fever
2. Night Fever by the Bee Gees
At this point I'm thinking choice number 2 is so obviously what it is...I just have "night fever night feeeverrr....." Yeah.

As I was discussing these possibilities one of my favorite male nurses gave the great diagnosis...."maybe you are turning into a werewolf". Which clearly makes sense. Random fever just at night? I haven't started sprouting any unsightly body hair but I'm thinking it's only a matter of time...
For more on my other diagnosis check out the video below. Thanks Dr. Gibb.

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